This shit is crazy: how do you NOT share food with your guests?
@malerbabomba in #Portugal they will not only offer you food, they will be offended if you do not accept.
@malerbabomba (from England) growing up it definitely always depended on the type of guest and prior arrangements, if a kid's friend had just stopped round on the way home from school, they'd be expected to head home before dinner, if they were already invited to stay/their parents were involved with arranging for them being there then they would be fed dinner, so it depends on if the guests are expected I guess!
@wolfie @malerbabomba in Sweden when I was a kid, you'd be sent to your friend's room while they ate dinner.
I'm not sure they still do it, and I'm rather certain it's a class thing - working class people wouldn't do this.
It's one of those things that was normal when I was a kid, but now just ... baffles me.
@panina @wolfie @malerbabomba same, I was just pondering this.
I think it may be a silent "I won't feed your kids", but also a "go home if you're hungry".
I would never consider doing this to anyone now as a grownup, but it does explain why friends almost never accepted food at my house as a grownup either, unless we planned to have dinner together ahead of time.
disordered eating mention
@maloki @wolfie @malerbabomba there's something about this that makes me think of something someone was talking about the middle class. How they'll never cook enough food. The food will be fancy, but never enough of it.
Not sure if that's because people buy more expensive food than they can afford, or if it's a disordered eating thing.
@panina @wolfie @malerbabomba on birdsite right now people around the world are horrified @ Sweden 😂 I mean sending them home for dinner I can see, but having them stay in the room while everyone else eats... why
@ljwrites @wolfie @malerbabomba my lovers' dad moved here from India in the 70's I think, and he'd be so furious with his kids' friends' parents.
He'd be like "not sure if this is racism, or if people here are just generally evil, but this is some shit..."
@panina @wolfie @malerbabomba saw a story about an Indonesian immigrant family in Sweden who actually burst into tears when a Korean family invited them to dinner, saying they had never been invited to anything in 10 years 😬 so racism definitely plays a part it seems, esp when whole families are excluded.
racism in sweden
@ljwrites @wolfie @malerbabomba it's a very common problem in sweden, because it's actually not in swedish culture to invite another family to your family dinners. Families only dine together on holidays like Christmas, Midsummer and possibly Easter.
Immigrants have been calling attention to how this strikes especially hard towards immigrants, as it makes it very, very hard to make swedish friends. But there's not really any big change in the attitude of white swedes. Because racism.
racism in sweden
@panina @wolfie @malerbabomba yup, it's not like Koreans or other people are less racist than Swedes, but preexisting patterns of isolation can definitely feed into racism and strike particularly hard at immigrants :/
Indeed. The idea of eating in front of someone without offering them what you have - whether it's at your own home, or on a train - it ruins the food!
@malerbabomba In my experience as a Finnish person, Finland should be more in the Usually Yes category
Um. As someone who lives in Austria (one of the countries marked as 'unlikely to give you food'): We actually do invite people to eat with us. It's just that 'oh you happen to be here, have some food' is not something we do. When we want to eat with you, we actually ask first.
So generalizing this as 'how do you not share food with your guests' overdramatizes this graphic because we have dinner invitations, we have invitations to cook together. I used to do that with friends when I was younger too.
I think social media blows this way out of proportion.
Crazy that Southern Germany is in the unlikely section. Always thought beer counts as food there. And as a guest you most likely will get a beer😉
Another coincidence / correlation was shown by @adrian - Protestantism.
And yes, I think that it could stick together: People living in protestant societies tend to keep distance.... less parties, less food for others - less virus exchange.
@mrpieceofwork omg i had not noticed that. Probably tectonic plates are moving faster than we thought. It will move to the mediterranean next… Siciceland it shall be renamed.
@malerbabomba Austrian here, we always offer food. If the guest isn't here at any of the meal times, coffee and snacks instead. I know my mum has always offered construction workers a meal and coffee when they worked on her house.
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@malerbabomba This is bullshit.